What goes through your mind when you imagine yourself as a
freshman going to high school? Scared, nervous, shaky, overwhelmed. Well I was
mostly all of those things as a freshmen going through high school, it was very
tough and agonizing. But before the year I made goals for myself; find new
friends, join a sport, and get decent grades. This is my life started to turn
around and change myself to becoming a better person.
As I go
searching for my identity in high school I stumble upon this sport called
wrestling. At first I thought is it WWE kind of wrestling but its not. After my
friend explained what it was I wanted to try it out and see how it will be.
When I first met the coach for wrestling Eddy Gudoy I thought he looked like a
chill and easygoing coach at first. I got to know him a bit before practice
before we started.
But I was
wrong Coach Eddy was tough and really strict when it came to practice time.
I’ve never been so pushed hard in my life before. But this was a change point
in my life where things got hard more challenging. Lifting weights is another
part of becoming a good wrestler. Even though I never lifted weights before I
am willing to try something new.
With this new sport it comes with new responsibilities like
time management and keeping up with schoolwork and grades. So what I did to
make myself more accustomed to my lifestyle now is to be more productive and
efficient when I work. Also having to be more studious now because of grade
checks. With this new sport that I’m involved in my parents expect more from me
because of all the activities I’m doing.
From then
on my life and my wrestling sport has been a great success and I am happy the
way I am now. Because right now I am a stronger and healthier person now then I
was before because of the changes I made when I was a freshman. Its gotten me
the way I am now more independent, hard worker, and responsible for my own
self.
hey branden
ReplyDeletei really liked how your vocabulary word bleded in very well with ur essay. i think that if you made your paragraph more longer and go into more detail then this will turn out great. so just keep on owrking hard and do your best. good luck
- souza
Branden,
ReplyDeleteThere are few sentence errors. Re-read your essay and look for repetitive words for example, "When I first met the coach for wrestling Eddy Gudoy I thought he looked like a chill and easygoing coach at first." You have already stated that when you first met the coach...you do not need to state that he was easy going coach AT FIRST. And I agree with Ryan and add more detail, give examples of how you have had to been more studious compared to the past, or how you were pushed hard, etc. EXPLAIN! good luck.